Couples planning to divorce who have children may struggle with the challenge of telling them the news. While feeling reluctant about delivering bad news is natural, you need to tell the children before someone else does. You don’t want them to hear about your divorce from their well-meaning grandma or the kids at school. Therefore, the sooner you tell them, the better.
How you tell your children that you are divorcing matters. Children are likely to remember this talk. Therefore, it’s important to talk with your spouse about how to break the news.
Some helpful tips
Here are some tips to help you tell your children that you are getting divorced.
- Tell them together, as a family. Don’t put the burden on one parent to share the news. Maintaining a united front is crucial, even when things are not going well between you. Put aside your differences and refrain from criticizing or blaming one another.
- Make the conversation age appropriate. Simple language should be used when discussing the divorce with younger children. Teenagers and older kids are generally capable of handling a more complex conversation.
- Answer your children’s questions honestly. They may ask where they will live and if they will still see both parents. Remind them that you both love them and will still see them.
- Acknowledge any emotional response your children exhibit, and don’t be surprised if they don’t react right away when you tell them the news. Give them time to process what you’ve told them and let them know that you are open to discussing things whenever they want.
One of the hardest parts about divorcing is telling your children. However they react to the news, make sure that they feel heard. Remind them frequently that you love them and you will get through this together.
When you are ready to take the next step, seek experienced legal guidance with filing for divorce.
